2006-03-13 - 11:49 a.m.

What a nicely busy weekend I had!! Earned a huge amount of pennies and found some potential new ways of earning pennies and yes.. I am just generally feeling like I have helped us financially!! LOVE IT!!

So Friday I babysat for Janey, which was of course the easiest way in the world to earn £20 since her kids are lovely and sweet and go to bed about 2 hours after I arrive usually! I got my weekly dose of utter childish silliness and ridiculously WILD imaginations and I watched Jane and Chris EXTENSIVE sky channels. I get a lot of time to reflect when I baby sit which can only be a good thing. Sitting in their beautiful house in beamish and just pondering my past my present and only very rarely the future. I would never WISH for time away from Gareth but I’m getting pretty damn good at using it productively :-D Go me!

So Saturday morning I went to watch a class Janey had been asked to teach but which she wondered if I would like to do instead. (Jane is a WAAAAY superior actor but she wants to spend the time with her kiddies) So I got up early and toddled along… only to discover to my ABJECT horror that I was NOT observing the class but taking them – ALONE without any introduction. Of course I should know about a gazillion things I could do and be able to perfectly execute the teaching I do after all have a degree – but you know when your mind just goes blank??? Oh dear me… the kiddies range from 8 to 14 and there were only 15 of them but wow I had no idea what they were capable of what they usually do how long the lesson is what their names were.. I basically knew they were there for a drama class and THAT WAS IT!!! I nearly poo’d myself. I did however survive and explained to them afterwards that I would usually have been FAAAR better because I didn’t KNOW I was teaching (hence wearing inappropriate clothing and looking like I’d been shot when she left the room upon my arrival) But yes they pay me £20 AN HOUR and we’re going for coffee this week to discuss where they want to take the theatre school eventually (they have some impressive plans) I would NEVER have gotten this job without Janey – who has never seen me act or teach and STILL trusts me enough to risk her reputation by handing one of her jobs to me. So yes I’m pretty excited and grateful and happy and kind of not believing that I get to do this. DO you understand?? I mean do you REALLY understand. All I have EVER wanted to do is direct and I’ll get to do it AND BE PAID and best of all – I get to direct kids (I LOVE KIDS) kids who I can give the gift of theatre to and eeeeeeeeeh!! Keep your fingers crossed for me lovelies because they haven’t rang to arrange a coffee meeting yet so maybe I’m imagining it!

I’m way too lucky and way too happy!!!!

We popped around to see Leesy and Kevin in their quickly becoming the trendiest house in the world.. It's so gorgeous I want to be sick with jealousy!!! but yes.. they're both exceptionally attractive so it only follows that their house would be the same eh? they live only one street up from us but we hardly see them these days but we draggged them out for coffee and caught up [whilst running into an X SHAG of Gareths who I absolutely DO NOT LIKE and who pretended i wasn't THERE STUPID PINKHATWEARING stink head] and that was pleasant and nice and nice again!

Saturday evening I spent sorting through old stuff at the littlemothers house. Founds loads of old school stuff and then some Andrew stuff. The school stuff made me smile and laugh (I’ll scan some hahaha you’ll be amused at how SAD I was) The Andrew stuff made me sad – old notes he’d written and even some stuff from when we were going out. I can’t believe the way things worked out with that part of me misses him terribly but a smaller though stronger part of me – knows it’s futile to try and pretend we’re ok. We’re not ok. When we do meet up he is like he always was and it’s like nothing has changed but all Viv has to do is ring him and then he’s all jittery and standoffish and I just.. I can’t do it anymore. I know he loves her and that is so important to me because I know he’s never been in love before I WISH he could understand what he’s doing but as long as he’s happy – which he truly is unequivocally – then I won’t even try to change it! One day maybe things will change again but you know.. for now I’m just grateful for the time he and I had together and for one of the greatest friendships I’ve ever known. The relationship was BOLLOCKS but his friendship meant the whole bloody wide world to me. I found all of the originals of his songs… I know he doesn’t have copies anymore so I’m going to post them to him for his birthday tomorrow. I’m tempted to print them here but if any of you said anything bad about them I’d cry. He’s a poetic genius and a fabulous writer * sigh * oh how I miss the Nandrew!

Anyway… yes I found a lot of old pictures of me while I was tidying so soon I will scan them for your amusement!! Hehe I was SUCH a funny looking kiddily!

HAHHA

Sunday I spent at the park in the snow with Gareth trying out my dads camera – which is nothing like what it was advertised and is a PIG and not THAT much better than mine. we then had our (usually saturday) catch up with Becca and Craig - have I mentioned I love them? I love them - we usually see them during the week and both me and Gareth were having withdrawal symptoms this week WE LOVE THEM A WHOLE HUGE LOT AND Becca mgiht ahve some MORE work for me 14 hours a week from home in my own time for £6.50 an hour for (I THINK she said) something to do with families who adopt or something so yes VERY interested in that and in the extra £90 [before tax] that would bring in WOOOHOOOO!!!! Becca is losing weight by the boat load and since she was ALWAYS gorgeous anyway - she looks even better now - not because of the weight but because of the confidence boost! craig wasn't well and was all sniffy which to be honest was exceptionally cute and I quite wanted to pet him!! haha nice Craig! Sunday night I babysat again but they went to bed knackered REALLY early and I got paid extra too because I was there until 2:30am!! While I was there I watched a one of the oh-so-overdone top 100 shows last night.. except it had a difference… it was the worlds greatest actors – as voted for by actors. FAAAAAAABUROUS!! I loved it – usually when I watch these things I feel frustrated and annoyed and people like… I don’t know… Keira knightly win (not that I dislike her particularly just she has ONE face one face seriously.. I’ll show you it sometime – angry face * pout * scared face * pout * Happy face * pout * and so on and so on!!) Anyway yes, as I was saying!! I loved it – loved hearing people who UNDERSTAND theatre, voting and there were very few I would change. Best of all was that Johnny Dep came second. I didn’t expect that because people overlook him so much. He is regarded as simply an attractive celebrity and try as he may to do diverse roles and small budget films.. he MAKES them big because he’s too big. You can say you don’t like him – and that is fine and I don’t mind if you get sick of hearing how attractive people think he is.. but He is a FANTASTIC actor and I almost wish he was ugly so that people understood truly how great he is!! Anyway.. yes that pleased me!! Also Judie Dench was top of the women – which pleased me a whole big lot. Problem with a lot of actors is that the stuff everyones seen is far from their best work.. Judie Dench is a fine example of this.. plus she’s a lovely lovely lady – or dame haha!

Oooh this is getting really long

I should go and do some work really yes?

Anyway.. more updates soon hopefully with scanned baby pics and such

LOVE TO ALL

x x x

IMPORTANT - ever wanted to help somebody who REALLY needed it.. want to make someone WONDERFUL smile? There is a girl across the ocean from me who has been a shining light for the whole time I've known her. Long story short she needs some medical help and she can't afford it (go to her diary and read the long long horrible saga of all my poor poor hothead has been through) and then even if it's only $5 (which is like £2 or something.. PLEASE if you CAN give do give she is genuine she is kind and she most certainly would do it for you IN AN INSTANT! I love her and I've never been able to help her.. now I can I've given what I can (which is a pathetic amount) I AM NOT FORCING you but I know that some of you will WANT to so I'm giving you the link! CLICK and PLEASE if that link doesn't work or if you want to just leave her some suportive comments go to CLICKCLICKCLICK if everyone who visits donates even $1 eventually she will be able to get back on her feet AND you'll know when she's rich and famous and sucessful - that YOU played a part in her recovery! I love her a whole lot I really do the stuff she's been through DESTROYS me!!

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