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2006-11-01 - 9:55 a.m.

Iíve been getting LOADS of headaches recently from not wearing my glassesÖ I didnít used to be SO dependant on them but WOW the pain is making me think maybe I should glue them to my head!!! I think maybe tiredness has something to do with it but Iím not seeing the possibility of an early night looming anywhere in the near future just endless busyness with no reprieve!

I donít even know what it is that I do that takes up so much of my time.

I feel kind of mopey at the moment and I donít really have any reason to be other than this:

I miss Alison. Itís not even that long since I last saw her but something about the run up to Christmas makes my brain hurt when I have to endure it without her. The pain of the West Highland Way is far preferential to this nasty nasty painful separation from my best friend. I feel so completely unsupportive because I know if she said she was going to quit it all and come home Iíd be the happiest girl alive! I wouldnít ever actually LET her quit unless it was for a RIDICULOUSLY good reason but it would take me ALL of my willpower not to cheer and run down there to pack her stuff for her if she so much as gave HINT to coming home for good. Itís so stupid I speak to her EVERY SINGLE DAY either via multiple emails or phone calls or texts but itís not the same as having her here physically.. to SEE her dripping beverages out of her nose through laughter Ė more than thatÖ to be the person she drips it onto or accidentally spits it all over!

We are vile and stupid but this was my first birthday that sheís not been here for (she came back last year) and I miss her so much!

I always feel bad when I miss her too because itís not like I got the bad part of the bargainÖ I have the REST of the bestfriendsgroupclanwhatever HERE with me and I ADORE them SOOO much!! Luckily they understand.. because they miss her too!

in leeds in next Ė being US

*sigh*

If you knew herÖ.. youíd understand!!

Mopemopemope

In other news Andrew has been in touch of his own accord this time and you know for all my head tells me heís a different person these days Ė I donít think he ever will be heís just further away heís still ANDREW and he still makes me smile!

The weather is changing Ė which makes me so happy!! I am aware that this is a weird thing to feel about impending frostbite and death by lack of sunshine but I HATE summer clothes I canít keep cool enough without exposing way too much flesh and looking like a big white whale but winterÖÖ winter is the season of mittens and scarves and huge woolly jumpers and hates and big socks and coats and being wrapped up and snugly and SNOW andÖ..

CHRISTMAS!!!!

More proof that Iíve never grown up. I love winter lovelovelovelovelove it! And Iím going to go and visit Ali for part of it even if itís just a little part and all will be well and cold and yaaaaaaaaaay!!!

Haha Iím highly amused at how quickly that lifted my mood!!

Fickly fickle moo!

lovelovelove

xxx

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